Strength

Well, I may not be getting any thinner, but I'm definitely getting stronger! For the past several weeks a friend of mine who does Crossfit has been kind enough to train me twice a week at my gym. I've gone from really weak to slightly stronger!

Feeling strong! (Photo from FreeDigitalPhotos.net)

What blows my mind most is I actually am acquiring upper body strength! I've never had any measurable upper body strength before, but each time I bench, do bent rows, or do assisted chin ups, I'm working at higher and higher weights.

As of this month, this blog is one year old. And I.....am approximately the same weight I was a year ago, if not a little higher (I don't know, I haven't stepped on the scale in months. I've been going by how my clothes fit). That fact could be really, really depressing if I stopped to dwell on it (again). One year gone by and no real success made, so what's the point of continuing? Why not just eat myself in to oblivion? No seriously, I've been asking.

Mmmmm...forbidden foods... (Image from FreeDigitalPhotos.net)

Over the last year, I've tried a number of different "tactics" to lose weight. I started on Weight Watchers, which I'd had great success on in the past, but was unable to stick with it for longer than a month. I tried the Slow-Carb diet from Tim Ferriss' Four-Hour Body. After three weeks I saw practically no change, although I admit this is probably from not following the prescribed diet closely enough and going too overboard on cheat days. I tried a Fruit and Veggie smoothie fast, which lasted approximately two days. NEED TO CHEW. I even tried binging on Pine nuts after I read that they can cause a reaction in some people that cause food to taste awful and metallic for a week or two. I thought, "Foods will taste awful! Then I won't overeat!" I ate two bags of pine nuts (already incredibly high in fat) in 48 hours, and I noticed no change in the way things tasted. I'd wasted all those calories on something I didn't even like. I've tried Intuitive Eating, where I try to just listen to my body and give it what it needs. The bad part about that would be my body screaming for vegetables, and I'd think, "Nah, too much work. You'll eat ice cream and you'll like it." I tried logging all foods and counting calories with various iPhone apps. MyFitnessPal worked well for a few weeks, but then I stopped logging when I ate something "bad" and never got back on track.
 

Lately I've just been tired. So tired. I know it's because of the way I eat. It's too much effort to make anything, so I'd just eat convenience crap.

Why am I still in the same place I was a year ago? There are many reasons. I'm human. I don't follow through. I don't "want it" enough (although I feel like I do!). I'm not doing the "right" thing. I have a physical and mental addiction to food. I have excuses.

The one thing I can say I'm doing well with is exercises. Besides the strength training I've been doing, I've also been tracking my workouts with GymPact since the end of January, and I've done 60 workouts for the year. With a little less than six months still to go, I think I can easily make 120 workouts for the year.

Bottom line: I'm still here, I'm still struggling, I'm still snarky, and I'm still blogging. Keep reading!