Dieting – You’re Doing it Wrong

Nothing makes me snarkier than listening to someone who doesn’t know how to diet try and explain to others how their way is “totally gonna work” and obviously makes perfect scientific sense.

The basic premise of losing weight is Eat Fewer Calories than You Burn, but it’s not quite that simple. Last week I was having lunch with my aunt, and she was telling me how she was so bummed because she’d been working out two hours per day and only eating 1000 or fewer calories, and she still managed to gain a pound. NO SHIT. You are starving your body and sending it in to starvation mode. It’s going to hang on to every precious calorie you allow it. Not to mention you’re messing up your metabolism so even if you eat “normally,” your body will still want to hold on to calories.

An old college acquaintance of mine has recently begun following the new PointsPlus program, and is documenting her progress on FaceBook.  The last time I saw her, she was in the upper 200s. She is assigned 29 daily points, just as I am. The first three weeks she had very large losses, over 3 pounds each week. Last week she only lost a pound. So she has decided to take it into her own hands and cut down her points – now she’ll only eat 26 points until she’s over this “plateau.” I want to shake her.

1. One week does not a plateau make.
2. Are you exercising? At all? You might want to start there before you start cutting out points.
3. Normal, healthy weight loss is 1-2 pounds a week. YOU ARE DOING FINE. Losing more several weeks in a row is unhealthy, and if you couple it with no exercise, you’re gonna end up with a lot of loose skin. Trust me.
4. Going from 29 to 26 points is probably not going to mess up your body. But what about when  you hit a “plateau” on 26 points? How low are you willing to go?
5. Suck up a low loss week, eat a different variety of foods, and exercise more. Trust the damned program.

Look, I’ve been there. The Weight Watchers program can be particularly triggering to eating disorders, even if you’re not prone to them. I remember playing the “how few points can I eat in a day” game with the old system. The answer was eight. That is about 600 calories. That is fucked up. Starving yourself never leads to anything good. It either turns in to full-blown anorexia or it leads to a binge. Whatever diet plan you’re on, it was designed by marketers experts, so can you try to trust them for a measly four weeks?